Game one: NYK Vs San Antonio Spurs. Can SAN Stand Ground at the Alamo?
The Alamo was penetrated hard in game one. Leaving SAN with gaping prayers, and some lube in mind.
Rest Vs Rust is one theme in mind prior to game one start. Alongside barbershop banter. Bodegas and secret service massage envy, along the way.
Backstories in mind include: The “#Tag Confusion” prayer group Vs “ChimiLube” sandwich. Put it on Towns secret services tap. On “that” house of South traveling “York”. Massage envy showed up again for New York.
When coming to Bronx town. Kat knows what to ask for in able to focus his balls towards the basket. Lube, dice, swish and more sandwiches.
Indeed player!
For real, Towns comes to town ready to eat a delicious “Chimi” baller with extra cheese.
Followed by two sweetish deep body massages. Two rooms down the hall, awaiting to be served. “Big Body” J. Brunson is lavishly being onboarded by two South East Asian darlings. Heavenly bodies in mind. ” I would like two massages, onion rings, a Chimi on a roll, two Bud Lights with extra ice pack lube. Pleas add it to K. Towns tap that Asian A#S% special tab account.” Oh for real player! exclaimed both Suzie Hoe and Mai Lin, back at big body Brunson.
Another word on Suzie Hoe. She may be a hoe but you still need and must treat her like a lady. Yes, indeed Suzie last name is also: Hoe. Not t be confused with Panda Express new sweet and sour Ho, Hoe Platter menu combo. Also, not available at PJ Chang, China Towns or anywhere near Ally Wong house of “Dirty Asians” Ally said this on her standup, not I.
For Real!
Imagine Christmas at her house. “hoe, ho!, hoe” Suzie.
Well I digress before asking one last question. Suzie, are you the only Hoe, in your family. “No player, I am the youngest ho! between two other hoes.
For Real!
Game one between the New York Knicks and San Antonio Spurs. Sprung towards my “Teli“, late Spring. On June 3rd. The NBA finals began in San Antonio, the Spurs leading home court vs NYK. The Knicks are favored to loose with odds facing the Spurs. Yes indeed, Wemby’s “Alien” invasion is real. Invading the Texas Alamo by defeating defending champions OKC. NYK arrived for game one with rust & lust in mind. Along with the usual frozen “Chimis” sandwiches and a slew of message envy personel.
For joints and pelvis MVP “libido” release.
For real!
On the Spurs side of the floor. V. Wembanyama is the youngest player to win finals Most Valuable Player or “Most Valuable Puto“. As he is known for in certain New York Rican bodegas. Beating Magic Johnson 22-298FG% from 1982. Kawhi Leonard 22-351FG% from 2014 and Tim Duncan with 23-061FG% in 1999. The year the Spurs defeated NYK in just 5 games.
Furthermore, Wemby is further aligning himself with yesterday greats. Competing to win finals MVP and making all NBA defense in the same season. Alongside Dwyane Wade (2006), Tim Duncan (1999), Magic Johnson (1982), Bill Walton (1977) and Kareem in 1971.
Toppled with playing next era basketball. The Spurs are 1st in NBA history to make finals after top-5 picks in 3 previous years with all 3 players: Wemby (1st pick in 2023), Castle (4th pick in 2024) & Haper (2nd pick in 2025).
Wemby lead the post-season by scoring 30Ps plus and a triple double to make it pass OKC. Etching towards greatness along with Walt Frazier (1978), Larry Bird (1987) & MJ (1989). Only three players in history average more career PPG VS the Knicks than Wembanyama 30.4PPG. MJ (32.0), Wilt Chamberlain (31.5) & Luka Doncic (30.8).
On the other side of the court. The New York Knicks will need to rely on: Brunson heroics, OG defense of Wemby and Josh Hart 3-PT shooting in able to sustain San. While Kat switches at center to assist OG with Wemby towards trying to drive him away from the painted area.
Different Directions: Since 1999
Historically, these two teams have been anything but equal. NYK are 27th in wins PCT ranking Vs 1st for San Antonio. Since 1999, the Knicks have attained 0 chips.
The Spurs have won 5 championships. Additionally, NYK has had 5 50+win seasons to that of 19 for the Spurs. While San has an impressive 2-50 loss seasons since 1999. The Knicks rank with 10-50 looses. While changing head coaches for NYC topple 15, just 2 for San Antonio.
The Knicks match well against the Spurs. 119.0(NYK) PPG Vs 115.3(San). With 45.1 RPG for the Knicks to 47.3 for San. Averaging 26.7 APG with under 25.1 for San. The Knicks beat San with FG pct at 51% to 47. Additionally defeating San Antonio in 3PT FG pct with 40% vs 36% for San Antonio.
Game one went to the Knicks. surpassing a 14+ PTS deficit, trailing to beat-off the Spurs with “gusto”.
The Knicks J. Brunson (30PTs), K. Towns (18PTs) & O. Anunoby: AKA by Charles B as “OG 1 Wakanda Nobi” scored (17PTs) To lead the NYK to victory in San Antonio 105 to 95. J. Hart scored just 3PTs for NYC but landed a massive 15 REB, 6AST with 4 STL.
The Knicks lead the Spurs 1-0. Much to disappointing Draymond Green’s remarks about Eastern conference challenges. More to come regarding the East Vs West “beef”.
V Wembanyama 26 PTS, 12REB, 3BKL was no match for “Big Body” ready for message envy lubing “Johnson”,
I mean Brunson. J. Brunson elevated his play with 30+PTS in game one.
The Spurs, S. Castle 17PTS, 8REB, 3AST with D. Fox 7PTS was 3/13FG from the field. The others for San Antonio allowed themselves to be exposed in game one. The Knicks lead a Q4 11-0 run with Wemby shooting 6/21 FG saying after loosing game one:
How Big Is This Game for NYK? Gaining momentum the Knicks are chipping back 1999, with joy. J. Brunson MVP performance along with K. Anthony Towns monumentality of spirit, devastated the Alamo.
Unfaced, Brunson was when going against Wemby’s Alien domination. With under 2min in Q4, J. Brunson has been the best player this post-season, according to BBQ Perk.
Does the Wemby “fatigue” as per pundits consideration is one narrative of concern for the Spurs.
Toppled with concerns regarding coaching. Post-game one are beginning to rise. Similarly to hot magma emanating from the earth. NYK is raising the bar after a dominating win.
“I Think we let that one go”–Wemby
The Knicks disassembled Wemby ability to position himself near the elbow.
While cutting his drives to the paint.
NYK Leads 1-0
“Chimi” indigestion rest, beats off rusty nuns.
Game Two is now a must win for San Antonio.
While Games 3 & 4 are back at the Garden.
Game two: NYK Vs San Antonio Spurs. The Bounce Back. Basket & Balls Special.
Between Two Ferms: Rudy and Historical Old New York. The essay reflects New York Knicks’ historic achievement. Reaching the NBA Finals for the first time in the 21st century. Following the NYK sweep of the Cleveland Cavaliers in a decisive Game 4.
Using satirical tongue and cheek. Blending sports analysis with a socio-economic overview of NYC.
The essay explores topics culled from sporting headlines and invents a bit of comedic magic. From mental sources, with love.
We begin game two, towards the end of the fourth quarter.
Injecting “we” to indicate first, second and third narratives. First, understanding historical past tense. To see the Knicks as a championship ready team. Second, I underscore several literary mental source material. Towards developing satirical narratives pertaining to basket & balls. Third and final future analysis is to underscore. The importance of winning a championship for the City of New York. Past, present and future are equal to 1st, 2nd and 3rd narratives between the NYK and San Antonio Spurs.
Knicks Win Game Two: But How?
With 4:34min left in Q4 the Knicks lead SAN 97 to 92. The Spurs when on a 9-2FG run. Forcing Mike Brown’s to call timeout. San Antonio tied the game 97 all with NYK scrambling to make runs. Then, with less than one minute left in regulation (57.3sec). Wemby drives to the basket with foul and layup at hand. NYK 102, SAN 103. Allowing the Spurs to regain the first lead of the half.
Clutch time J. Brunson settled the score with a marvelous mid range shot. With under (33.3sec) left, the Spurs fouled J Brunson. Missing one out of two free throws, NYK holds on top. In what can only be describe as a series of bad plays by the Spurs down the stretch. Allowing the Knicks to steal game two with a final score: 105 NYK to 104 Spurs.
Say what about Wemby’s tower of confusion. Read on.
The Knicks 1st, 2nd and 3rd roster are playing great basketball. J. Brunson 20Pts, 5Reb, 6Ast. M. Bridges 20Pts, 6Reb, 6Ast with K. Towns playing the (3) spot with 21Pts, 13Reb and 4Ast are pushing Wemby towards fatigue. While O. Anunoby 17Pts with M. Robinson 7Pts are co-authoring assignments, defending Wemby.
Different from NYC.
SAN V. Wembanyama, aka: “wemby” scored big with 29Pts, 9Reb & 2Ast. Wemby is the most versatile 5 or 4 big in the game. Victor can dominate the paint while shooting behind the 3Pt line. Executing with excellence when positioned in the elbow to mid range painted area. On game one & two however, coaching experience dominated the spectacle.
The others for San Antonio played with lackluster enthusiasm. D. Vassell 14Pts, 9Reb, 5Ast. De Fox. 20Pts, 3Reb, 5Ast with D. Harper 15Pts, 6Reb, 3Ast.
While the Knicks are winning defensive matchups on Wemby this season with: Karl-Anthony Towns 53, OG Anunoby 40 & Mitchell Robinson at 37.
Say What About Wemby’s Tower of Lube Confusion
First, according to mental sources. On the eve of game two at the Alamo Dome, aka: Wemby’s bedroom training facility. Laying, analyzing and watching game stats. Eating his usual pre-game meal. French baguette, Beaufort cheese with sun dried tomatoes and Pinot, at hand.
Wemby notice the following #hashtag on SAN (X) account. “Hashtag Halleluiah” for thoughts and prayers from beloved Spurs fans.
For real!
Wemby could have further inquire from team scouts. Yet without further inquiry he decided to reach out to the group on a private channel entitled: “Confessions of a Sinful Nun” from Nina Hartley with love. Having only seen “hashtag halleluiah” on (X) Wemby understood the group to be religious in nature. Further, much to Wemby surprise was a set of developing stories surrounding his meeting on (X) live.
“This is not the hashtag for Catholics anonymous, young men.” Replied adult film star Nina H. “Are you looking for an autograph or perhaps a private screening of the film to aid with beating the Knicks in game two”
Much to the confusion, amazement and lack there of. Wemby had to be taken to private quarters by SAN head coach Mitch Johnson. Who told Wemby privately:
“I apologize Victor, my (X) group showed up on your feed. I tend to watch these films ahead of game-time
Mike Brown is kicking my royal butt & my experience leading the team is beginning to show if we don’t win. Steven A Smith might call me out to get fired bro”
Wemby: “Well coach, the Nina’s sisters are on their way. I promised tickets to BBQ royal coral and drinks to Heaven and Ribs, if we win game two. To be fair, I was under the impression this was a legit prayer group coach”
Narrator: for real, replied head coach Mitch “Nun Johnson” as he is often called in private by the group head mistress. Her head spins in glory with one single “H” word. Guess which one. Apparently hashtag “halleluiah” is used by two different groups on (X) One is a prayer group lead by SAN Catholic missionary, position sisters. Toppled with that of an adult film star hash entitled: “Hashtag Halleluiah”. Oh dear. Apparently (X) subscription services offer (XXX) groups, thus causing Wemby’s tower of confusion strategy.
Mitch “Nun”- Johnson: “My focus for game two is to ensure unforce errors, distractions and errors are slimmed down to a minimum. I cannot allow Mike B to outmaneuver game two. Please let me know when the sisters arrive.”
Wemby: “For real Coach. Which prayer group are you referring. All I know is I have two groups coming to see the team. I wouldn’t mind a little prayer film festival in my room!
I mean you know how us French people are. But not before games, ok! What would our beloved Greg “Pop” do“.
Mitch “Nun” -Johnson: ” I got it from him. Please keep this information to your French connection self, please.”
At the end of Q4-game two. Wemby missed a potential go-ahead FG with 02seconds left. Missing a long jumper from the elbow.
Knicks are headed back home with a commanding 2-0 lead.
Toppled with coaching woes from SAN to fall in play for New York.
Game three: Back at the Garden of Tasty Celebrity’s Delights. NYK lead 2-0
After a devastated 0-2 loss to NYK at the ranch in SAN. The Spurs needed to roll into practice, Wemby’s post game comments:
” I want to win so bad is like my life depends on it“
At the Garden, Wemby had to wear “Depend” diapers due to “Street” meat pre-game eatery activities. In game 3, another backstory emerges from the streets of tasty celebrity trucks. According to mental sources, Wemby said after the game “No one smelled Sh#T, at the Garden”.
I highly recommend “Depend” for NBA players diaper brand.
Inside the NBA Charles Barkley mentioned wearing depend diapers against the Chicago Bulls, during the 1993 finals. Charles, an avid food truck foodie aficionado. Orders extra large, Halal chicken lamb combo meal. Outside the garden of Eden delights. Barkley is often spotted before telecasting Inside the NBA with enough condiments. Capable of feeding the entire continent of Africa.
Prior to Game 3, Charles was seen engulfing in what can only be described as “his Alabama” donkey big old butt. Capable of navigating the Earth magnetic field. Eating lamb chicken gyro plate, with extra “White” sauce. As Charles exclamative emphasis was heard on the streets, outside the Garden. “Yo, my man! put some more Lamb on that Mother F#cke&“. For real! Charles loves him some “White Sauce” as he eloquently pours what looks like “gizzy” BBQ sauce. Over yellow Middle Eastern African rice. No pun was indented towards Knicks OG Anunoby. Nor how Charles feels towards the African community.
Don’t ask Uganda Olympic players.
In contrast, ESPN Malika Andrews “Really Charles, street meat” comments were not taken lightly by OG1. Anunoby. OG is the sole business partner behind all food truck vendors outside Madison Square Garden. Prior to joining the Knicks, OG1 Anunoby ran several successful halal food trucks, around NYC. Specially design to combat inflation prices during sporting events. In addition to Charles monumental appetite. OG1 ensured ESPN Malika Andrews she may:
“Come and inspect our African Street Meat whenever she desires“. As per OG1 Wakanda Anunoby. “Street Meat vendors have to pass food and health inspections from both Hebrew National and Spike Lee meat lovers committee”.
Sources close to the meat, reported seeing Malika food tasting outside the Garden, Pepto Bismol at hand.
These vendor trucks included: “African Golden Goose”, “Beef Patty Patrick”, Ernies “Vanilla South African Juice” and the Malika’s favorite. “Halal Lube” on the rocks. Managed and owned by OG1 “Wakanda” Anunoby.
In addition to Spike Lee calling Draymon “a hater” ahead of game 3 Vs San. The East has defended the Garden. With respect and pride. Draymond spoke lesser remarks regarding East level competitive spirit. With added historical stats on his side to backup his comments. Despite selling his real intentions behind rising awareness for his upcoming Tequila bottle brand:
“If you at the club and wanna act up. Break up a battle of Draymond’s Cumme. Pale, pasty Tequila liquor. For any asshole out there”.
Haters gonna hate Spike, I got 4 rings said Draymond.
Game 3: A Must Win for Wemby Spurs.
At the Garden of NYC Eden “Footie” Delights. The Lights Shine Bright.
ESPN Brian Windhorst NBA finals tower of power strategy describes the following rules. For a successful NYK Vs San Antonio contest:
- Brunson PTs Heroics: On full display: GM1,2
- Wemby Energy: On display during game 3, while away from the Alamo.
- OG Defense on Victor: GM1,2.
- Josh Hart 3-PT Shooting: Lackluster thus far. Must roll on Gm4
- Kat at Point Center: GM 1,2.
Together with Wemby’s energy whilst the “Others” for San. Played with poise, wit and determinism. Q1 rolled onto the scene. The Garden, filled with magnetic tectonic forces. Overlooking young stars (San) rubbing up against aspiring kings from “New” York. That is, Brooklyn, Queens, The Bronx, Staten I and Manhattan. Charles who mistakenly used the term Cities instead of Boroughs. While the ghost behind “Sir” Williamsburg Burrows wrote with anxious anticipation. While predicting Spurs will add points on the board.
In games 3 and 4, the Alamo Alien rises the Garden floor.
Who is the greatest Knick?
“Patrick E is not allowed to have it his way when ordering onion rings at Burger King”
Patrick does eat plenty of Jerk Chicken + secret “Jerk” services at Kat’s Bronx Massage envy Barbershop, Chimi + Lube services.
Yet, I tend to agreed.
P. “No Onion Rings for You!” Ewing is absolutely the greatest Knick in NBA history.
Patrick, made a pithy appearance during game 3 pre-game show. Dressed from rehearsal for Broadway’s hottest play: No Onion Rings for You at “Golden Krust”. The Musical on 69th Street, Jamaica Queens.
The Spurs dominated Q1, playing game 3 similarly to elimination. Toppled with performing a 4-6 3PTS FG run with 3:33min left. San held NYC to just 17PTS to that of 24PTS for SAN. Winning the first quarter 33 SAN vs 22 NYK. S. Castle, De Fox and the “French” alien Wemby. Managed to display poised energy. Early.
Furthermore, after scoring 26PTS, 12REB, 3BLK on game 1. In addition to adding 29PTS, 9 REB and 4AST on game 2. Wemby game must elevate to another level, surpassing a 30+ feast. In able to avoid a 3-0 deficit in the series.
On the other hand, the Knicks bounce back Q2. Elevating glory and play with fierce competitive action. The half concluded with a 64PTs vs 57PTs NYK run. Giving NYK a slight margin of victory.
Impressive Halftime Highlights for NYC Vs San.
Scoring 22Pts Q1 with an impressive 42Pts boost in Q2. Shooting 8/18 Q1 while raising the bar to 14/19 Q2. Dominating the half with 6/9 3-Point FG, up from under 2/8 Q1. Free throws attempted Q1 4/6 to that of 8/8 in Q2. J. Brunson overall FG Q1 2/7 up with 3/4 Q2. NYK at times played with lackluster energy, almost feeling game 3 was up for grabs.
Contrary to NYK, the “Others” for San played extremely well. S. Castle is having a 1999 moment against the Knicks. With 18PTS. Yet the Knicks bounced back to dominate the half: 64PTS to 57PTS.
Q3 Game Highlights: Sponsored by “Depend” Player In Mind Diapers.
Victor, AKA: “Escalator to heaven French baguette” Wembanyama pre-game meal. Delight, amaze and penetrate beyond my mouth’s understanding. Encompassing sun dried tomatoes, goat cheese, vinegar oil. Served on bruschetta style toasted French baguette, spread.
Toppled with his favorite NYK halal “Street Meat” meal ensemble. Comprise of lamb, yellow rice, shredded romaine lettuce with extra BBQ white sauce. Poured while toasting on “Nina Hartley” red bone Sangria or fruit juice as the team comes, to order.
Apparently Wemby wore “Depend” diaper’s thought game 3. Raising the bar while being able to let his bowl movements go, with ease. At the half, Wemby turned towards team mate J. Champagnie with a probing question.
Wemby: Hey do you smell that?
Champagnie: Nah bro. I don’t smell Shit.
Wemby: Thanks to “Depend” I smell like lemonade instead of Sh#t. For real. We really need to rally after our lack luster performances during games 1 and 2.
I cannot afford to take bathroom breaks, during quarters.
Champagnie: Man, you’ve been dropping operation Poop and load while on the floor?
All am thinking about is my “Jurley Curl” African gangster Chia Pet collection. Along with 1,000 bags of pennies and some Champaign. I mean after the game, of course.
In my head, I hear:
“Got to drop more pennies on my Chia Pet “gang star” collection.
In addition to feeding my Chia’s Champaign instead of water.
Wemby: For real, you don’t smell that? over my “Depend” absolvent load.
And one more thing: You be Cuckoo for Coco Puffs, Champagnie.
Like his life depends on anal and asses.
Q3: Spurs Maintain Steady Margin Win
The third quarter rolled with monumental plays from Wemby’s 22PTs to that of Castle 18PTs for the Spurs. Toppled with Wemby 70th post season BLK. With a 7-3 win away from home statistical record. Q3 enticed the the Garden with back to back offense. Culminating in lead changing fast breaks . Similarly to watching Ali Vs Fraser, game 3 was a delight to watch.
The Spurs are playing for survival. While the Alamo stood on firm ground, maintaining Wemby’s tower of power energy momentum. San wins Q3 with a closing basket and balls, towards the end. 92PTs Spurs vs 91PTs for NYK. Contrary to J. Brunson getting 4 fouls by the end of Q3. Leading to coach Mike Brown post game comments. Calling out a lack of referee blow. Meaning whistles didn’t get blown, snored or called during game 3 for the Knicks.
Q4: Can Alien Energetic Forces Drop A Load. While Adding One Win On The Road?
Hitherto, quarters 1 through 3 witness an aggressive Spurs team. Lack of whistle blows for NYC. Toppled with another 4th quarter lack luster performance for K.A Towns. The Spurs outscored NYK 58-47 in the 2ND half. Shooting 23-20PG during the last quarter of the ball game. SAN Dylan Harper is averaging 14.7 PPG, 7.7 RPG, 2.7 APG in the Finals. Playing with house money, down 0-2. The Spurs entered the Dias of tasty garden delights. With a chip of Wemby’s Alien: 32PTS, 8REB, 6AST energy. Stealing game 3, the Spurs 115 to NYK 111.
Stunned, the Garden celebrity row comprise amongst NYC entertainment finest.
Tina Fey, Tracy Morgan, John McEnrow, Ben Stiller, John Stewart, Timothy Chalamet and Kylie “pretty feet” Jenner. With Spike Lee, bench warming the garden since Dinosaurs roam Earth.
Together with New York Knicks ghost of basket balls past.
John Starks, Patrick E, Allen Houston, Walt Frazier, Charles Oakley, Melo, Jeremy “dressed to be involved in Triad activity” Lin & L. Springwell.
Witness V. Wembanyama dropping 32PTS, 8REB, 6AST at the Garden. Cementing while reminding NYK fans. Game 5 will take place at the Alamo. Thus evoking 1999 Y2K fears of the Knickerbocker kind. Wemby further anointed the win by joining Tim Duncan as only Spur with 3 straight 25-point finals game. Cutting NYK post-season win streak to 13. Second to the Warriors 2015 (15Win Streak). And third to the Spurs 1999 (12Win Streak).
In addition, San Antonio has been down 0-2 in the post-season. Bouncing back by relying on Wemby’s dominant aggressive play with defensive zoning strategies. Indeed, game four is a must win for NYK.
Winning game 3, honored V. Wembanyama by being the youngest 22 year old, 155 days with 30-point game in NBA finals. Raising comparisons with 1980 Magic Johnson NBA finals appearance.
The others for San played great on the road. J. Champagnie 12PTS, S. Castle 23PTS, De. Fox 12PTS with D. Harper 13PTS overall. Dumped a series load onto the Garden floor.
On the Garden home court. The Knicks captain, J. Brunson scored equal to Wemby with 32PTS, 5REB, 5AST. Brunson received several hard fouls thought the game along with J. Hart as well. K. Towns was stunned yet again in the fourth. Scoring 11PTS will simply not cut it during the Finals against SAN. O. Anunnoby 28PTS, 5REB, 1AST and J. Hart 16PTS, 9REB with 5AST kept NYK afloat.
Although this may be true, winning game three gained momentum for SAN. The Knicks need to raise intensity. Positioning K. Towns to have a dominating Q4 is vitally imperative in game 4. While the Spurs figured how to rest Wemby. Aligning the offense to run via Castle 23PTS feast. The series New Yorkers imagined would end in 4 games. Now rest on a possible game 6 or dare I say 7. Let us not remind ourselves back to 1994, NYK vs Houston final remarks.
“Never underestimate the heart of a champion”
–Rudy Tomjanovich.
‘New’ York loss in seven games to the Rockets.
With a dueling rivalry strategy, SAN has finally won at the Garden. Backstories in mind for game four, shall include:
Jeremy Lin dress attire during Sports Center. Begins to indicate “Triad” eatery rivalry, East of China Town. According to mental sources, J. Lin owns several nail/foot job and rub salons. Offering an array of Eastern services. Including the house special “Dumpling General THO Chicken” Managed by Jeremy’s wife Suzie Hoe. Suzie is the kind of hoe who confuses everyone to be a man.
Game four: The Battle Between Come & Back == The Comeback Special.
Can the New York Knicks Bounce Back Win in Game 4? The Series Thus Far: NYK 2, Spurs 1.
Victor Wembanyama plays great when positioned near the elbow painted area. Contrary to K. Towns, lacking energic efforts during fourth quarters is beginning to show up. Towns is averaging 29min with 0PTS, 0-6FG-FGA with 1AST and 0 blocks and steals. Furthermore, Knicks turned the ball over 13 times in game 3. Relying on J. Brunson hero ball dominant theatrics while Wemby has been outstanding. Playing with NBA all NBA defensive stance, the new Garden villain is now Wemby. When asked if he was the new villain for NYC, Victor responded:
“I am not like Trae Young”-Wemby
Back at the Barbershop of First Take. Questions are arousing BBQ cuts and fade.
- How critical is winning game 4 for the Knicks?
- More credit to Spurs or criticism to Knicks for game 3 result?
SA has not lost 3 straight games all season. Including regular season and post-season play. Toppled with NYK 13-game win streak was snapped in game 3. Th 2nd longest all time within a post-season, since 2017 Warriors (15win). The Knicks played to their strengths when J. Brunson plays off the ball. Towns is avarafing 16.7PTS during first 3 QTRs. Shooting 19-31 FG and 9-9 FT.
Kat in the fourth has been clocking out early due to pre-game “Chimi” activities and having to deal with OG1 & Jeremy “Triad” Lin side hustles activities.
Read on Player!
Towns averaged 11PTS in game 1 vs the Hawks. Scoring equal for 16 games in a row. 1.6PTS/minute at 1.6 with under 0.1 since playing Atlanta. His FG performance is equal with 4/4 and now 4/22. With poor 3-PT advances at 2/2. Down since departing from Cleveland at 0/4. Winning game four is extremely critical for NYK. Jalen Brunson 26.0PTS, 46%FG, 3.1REB and 6.2AST post-season averages need to continue.
Albeit to SAN others, S. Castle game 3 heroics with 8/14FG +6 is up from games 1 & 2. Julian Champagnie also leads San Antonio in PTS with 9. Including 2/4 3-point FG with an impressive +7/minus differential. Up from -20, 0/4 shooting and executing well from the bench.
Q1 Rolls onto the court of Garden Delights. Amongst the stars in attendance: Larry David, Susie Essman, Jimmy Fallon with Jerry Seinfeld. “Jerry!” was seen stuffing his bagel round face with two stuff crust Pizza’s. Mr. Seinfeld often misses critical game points while seen in awe and amazement when the camera pans onto his profile.
For Real!
The Spurs mount an offensive 12-5 run early on while Kat draws two early fouls. SAN on top by 19PTS with what can only be described as “Blow and Awe” by cheering Knicks fans, up above the bleacher desk”
“Hey Blow, yes am talking to the officials. Get that bloody whistle out your royal “arssed” mate, and put it in your bloody mouth. You hear me Blow! Welcome to New York, mate.
–MSG top row fans. From New York.
With under 6:06min the Spurs continue to score at will. Mounting an additional 8-0 run. Shifting the barbershop question: How will the officiating assist NYK or lack thereof, following coach Mike Brown criticism? As Q1 finalizes with the Knicks trailing by 19PTS. 22 to 41 with Wemby, Castle & Champagnie leading along. J. Brunson pre-game comments are quickly forgotten.
“Our mindset has to be better“
The Knicks need to figure how to drive Wemby away from the elbow. I shall now predict NYK will win the series in 6 games.
Onto the second half (Q2) with trails, woes and lack of positive blow for New York. The evil Alamo alien from San Antonio is having a 1999 moment vs the Knicks. J. Brunson dribble jab dominant strategy is causing NYK the half, possibly the series. How does ball dominant players perform during the post-season when playing to win championships? 0-4 When thinking about Melo, Luka, Harden and Westbrook. The Alamo rolls out a clinic of shooting delights along with historic second half finals performance.
SAN 76, NYK 49 at the half:
- Wemby 16PTS
- J. Brunson 19PTS
- Towns 6PTS
The Spurs (27PTS) historic halftime lead is the third, greatest feast in NBA history. Second to LA Lakers 2020 (28PTS) lead. First to the Celtics (30PTS) lead in 1985.
According to mental sources, coach Mike Brown pulled K.A Towns to the bathroom, asking for explanations. Regarding his lack luster performance:
Coach Brown: What’s going on with Kat’s deli? talk to me player!
KAT: Coach, hitherto I have been distracted by OG1 street meat side hustle.
Coach Brown: Is OG1 “wakanda” Onnunoby driving Uber.
KAT: Nah, his food trucking “street meat” with BBQ white sauce on the side is barking into my territory.
Coach Brown: Yikes, dog. And then?
KAT: Toppled with Jeremy “Triad” Lin East of China Town. Offering his version of dumpling “ChimiLube” with “Me love you, long time” pay any price coupons. Leaving me with just two South Bronx massage envy’s and one Trap & Rub apartment in the Heights.
Coach Brown: And then?
KAT: I had to recruit the “Jurley Curls” along with “Washington Heights” real “New York” to assist in these matters. Bloody Hell, coach.
Coach Brown: And then?
Chimi sandwich toppled with bacon with extra large rings. Toppled with yellow African rice, lamb, shredded lettuce with BBQ white sauce. Follow by his favorite “Lin Sanity” combo meal: Four dumplings with duck sauce, general TOH chicken or “Tits Over Hoe” pay any price Mon-Friday before rush hour PM.
According to sources inside the locker room, not thinking about Shams Charania who was also seen ordering “Lin Sanity” meals before 5pm on a Wednesday, for real Player!
Shams asked coach brown to explain his half time eatery coaching strategy.
Coach Mike Brown: “I am not at liberty to discuss my players side hustle battles between each other. Other than I take no sides when ordering. I try to maintain an orderly locker room. We need to imagine playing for the biggest come & back play in history.”
Shams: “You mean comeback, coach” Coach
Mike Brown: “Yes my sweet brown sugar brotha! I had food in my mouth.
With the Inside Guys Ernie, Shaq, “Kung fu Kenny” Draymond “hater” Green & Charles “hates Africans Barkley”. Awaiting Shams Charania locker room reporting.
Q3 began with anticipation. Sponsored by depending on whether the Knicks can hold it using “Depend” diapers. SAN is playing to even the score 2-2. San head coach Mitch “Nun” Johnson traveled with Nina’s, prayers and “Halleluiah” nuns in mind. More to come, back at the Alamo Dome in game five.
The Knicks rolled onto the Garde with an impressive 13-0 run with under 5:18min left. J. Brunson began to find rhythm with his signature slashing midrange cuts to the basket.
OG Anunoby, better known by his several aliases: “OG1 Wakanda Anunoby” “Street Meat OG1” and Charles favorite, “Hey Uganda Fool OG1” dropped 25PTS. The Knicks relied on J. Brunson and OG. Anunoby duet offense.
Attempting to chip away at history’s 27 PTS deficit. In addition, with under 2:12min left in Q3. The Knicks continue to play ball, cutting SAN lead to under 15PTS. NYK 72 to SAN 87. As the quarter wrapped towards the end. SAN maintained a comfortable 90PTS to that of 75PTS for the Knicks.
Interlude: Between Two Ferns. If these basket balls, could talk.
Rolling on to Q4.
Sports is the ultimate reconciliatory event.
My goal, to summon cultural appropriation using tenacity of spirit.
Comedy is defined as blurring controlled hysteria with punchline delivery and candor.
Bridging what I have come to call: “Walt Wittman’s” NYC strategy. I shall praise the City that grew on me. Nurtured me, coiled me while schooling me. On Ways and Means about the Arts. With unwavering love, eatery and tenacity.
Read on Player!
Not to judge, critique or to angerly call me a racist. Rather to weight, ponder and consider.
The Knicks began Q4 without Kat’s basket and grace. Playing with foul troubles and side hustled activities in mind. NYK trailing the Spurs by 15PTS. Started to play with poise. SAN bench outscored NYK 26PTS to 4PTS. Equally important, with under 6:14min left.
The Knicks mounted a 13-2 run. Cutting SAN lead to double digits, 98 to 88 PTs.
Will the fourth quarter see Kat’s Deli secret South Bronx strategy. Come, back to erect life at the Garden.
Read Part One of Three.
Toppled with “Chimi Churri” sandwich shop restaurants. Servicing VIP or “Vagina In Player” accommodations. In a world were prostitution is “Vegas” everywhere legal. Competing vendors aim to create marketing servicing calls to action.
While equally competing with both OG1 Mid-town “Street-meat” brown sugar gal trucks. Alongside Jeremy “Lin” Sanity. China Town, not for Towns dumplings specials. Offering “we love you, long time” foot rubs with extra general THO sauce.
First quarter saw the Spurs playing with ease and wit. In addition to a lack of whistle, blow for NYK. Followed by a second quarter historical 29PT deficit. Lead by Wemby midrange paint dominance. Third, NYK tried to close mind the gap with defensive strategies. Additionally, the Knicks offense rally with a 17-4 run. With less than 4:53min left in the fourth quarter. Closing in on SAN 99 to 95 lead. Once again, the upper “New” York Rican Brits. Were seen screaming towards SAN head coach:
“Call time out Mitch Nun, Johnson! Your bloody balls are running out of Garden Juice”
–The New York Rican Brits comprise of British NYK fans, traveling across the pond. Bringing back the “Old York” back to New York.
San Antonio began to loose the matchup battle late in Q3. The Knicks outscored SAN 18PTS to 6. In addition to NYK 6-14FG to that of 1-10FG for the Spurs.
Toppled with 0-6 3-PT FG. While the Knicks shoot better from behind the 3Pt line at 3-8FG. Coupled with J. Brunson midrange dynamics. O. Anunoby heroics.
Not to mention Towns showing up in the fourth. Not since 1973 the Knicks mounted the biggest possession in history. With 5.7sec left, NYK trailing SAN 105 to 106. Forcing coach Mitch Jonson to call time out. Inbounding the ball, the Knicks have one final chance. Anunoby dishes the rock to Brunson, firing up a 3 pointer miss. Tipping towards Anunoby graceful tip with 1.2 sec left. Knicks take the lead 107 to 106. Cutting to time out, the Garden of tasty delights: Adam Sandler, Larry David, Taylor Swift “jumping” jack trio. With Jerry Seinfeld awe and confusion appearing to have missed Anunoby final tip in. Apparently Jerry was stuffing himself with Pizza Hut “Double Crust” cheese and bacon with bagel delights.
Knicks win game 4 with a monumental comeback win. Someone had to inform Spike lee the series is 3-1 in favor of NYK. Spike reacted as if New Yok had won the series.
The Knicks monumental blow, out cut and fade. Coming back from a 29Pt deficit to roast the Spurs.
The Inside Guys were seen paraphrasing and telecasting. “We have seen the biggest comeback” not since a donkey came back trailing aspiring Kings from New York. Word & play in mind. SAN V. Wembanyama 24PTs, 13REB, 1AST fell short.
To O. Anunoby 33PTs, J. Brunson 36PTs and K. Towns 13PTs, 10REB, 2 AST monumental come, from behind. Win
Game 5 is back at The Alamo. With New York on top 3-1. Can Alien Forces Hold Court. The Alamo last change at a title.
Game five: Teams Leading 3-1 In a 7 Game Series Go on to Win 95% Is Due or Bust for SAN
The San Antonio Spurs are facing elimination, down 3-1 to NYK. New York last chip was back in 1973. While SAN has won 5, since 1999. V. Wembanyama is perhaps the most versatile big men in history. In Contrast, J. Brunson is a rather Cinderella story for the Knicks.
The Knicks this postseason since going down town, 2-1 Vs Haws. Has been finger licking, good to see. Furthermore, winning 15-1 with 117.1 PPG. Leading a 49.7 FG Pct and 100.0 OPP PPG is short of amazing.
Not to mention 42.7 OPP FG Pct to galvanize the Easter conference alongside J. Brunson. The team captain who took 100+million less in able to allow team building. Brunson, together with the rest of the team. Is averaging 42.2 FG% this postseason. With a remarkable 30.4 from 3P% Brunson’s FG% when trailing/tied raises to 51.0. Toppled with his 3P% also ascends to 43.6%. The Knicks are better equipped when trailing teams. This stat will be tested and tried one more time in game five.
Q1 at the Alamo of “Prayers Delight” began following it’s usual script. NYK bounce in with lackluster 2-13, shooting poorly from the field. Q2 saw the Spurs mount a tremendous 16Pt lead with under 5:30min left. Yet, the quarter ended with NYK on top: 24pts to 19pts with J. Brunson rope-a-dope strategy. Similarly to how Ali defeated Foreman, since game four onward. J. “Big” body Brunson went on the ropes. Gloves high, learning back into loose ropes and let Foreman throw. The “rope-a-dope” was a defensive shell designed to tire an opponent out.
The Knicks tired Wemby by forcing him to run. Moving him away from the paint is how OG Anunoby was able to win game four. With his “Jerry” you missed the final tip in basket. Anunoby had no issues tipping the basket while Wemby was seen dragging his feet, running behind OG during the final seconds of the game (4).
While Q3 saw no differential improvements from SAN whose lack of experience was on full display. The Spurs defeated defending champions OCK whom were better equipped to defeat NYK. The Knicks beat SAN to win the Emirates cup. Not to mention NYK have been together as group, longer than SAN. S. Castle for the Spurs was 0-7 by the end of Q3 yet the Spurs won the quarter: 30Pts to just 28Pts for the Knicks.
Bouncing, balls onward. Q4 began with D. Harper for SAN mounting an offensive clinic. The Knicks trailed most of game four. Yet I remind the reader of Brunson 51.0% when trailing/tied. Up from 42.2% Throught the fourth, NYK continued to rope-a-dope the Spurs. With Jalen Brunson scoring all 8 points as the Knicks went on an 8-0run, cutting the Spurs leas to 83-81. San Antonio missed three shots and turned the ball, twice.
In the final two minutes, the Spurs tied the game, but missed shots and free throws. The Knicks gained extra possessions with offensive rebounds and made late free throws. OG1 Anunoby rebounds like an “Wakanda” arch angel. With pride and confidence.
With under 5:18min in the quarter. Jalen Brunson has 36 points, shooting 12 for 23 from the field and 4 for 7 from 3Pt. Tiding the score at a monumental duce with 4:43min left, 83pts all. The Spurs lack of experience, depth and mental mistakes are beginning to coalesced. Into something real that can be described towards how Ali defeated Foreman. Foreman was used to guys folding in two rounds. Ali made him missed just enough, absorb just enough and keep swinging. Similarly to Wemby’s alien attack on “big body” Brunson. Persevering lack of whistle, blows. Including kicks, elbows to the chest and then some, at the hands of the Spurs.
Further, with less than 2min left in Q4 the Knicks jabbing strategy from behind. “The way Wemby’s mother likes it”. Mount an impressive 15-2 run to tied the game at 88 duce. In addition to Towns fouling out.
Can SAN capitalize to force a game six? Hitherto, Victor Wembanyama has 18 points, 12 rebounds and 5 blocks. His rebound in game five marks a significant impact for San Antonio. Picking up with 26.1 seconds left in SAN season. D. Harper misses a critical layup. Brunson scoring at the other side of the court to give NYK a 90pts to 88 lead. Wemby’s insistence to shot 3Pts during critical areas thought the game. Missed the mark with under 16.3sec left. Castle grabs the rebound, score. NYK 92 to SAN 90.
The Knicks formula behind one point per possession, even when trailing was on full display. The Spurs foul Anunoby, giving the Knicks a 94pts to 90pts advantage. With rope-a-dope and jabbing in mind. NYK win their first championship of the Century. Winning Q4, 94Pts to 90Pts to a less experience Spurs. J. Brunson 45Pts with 3Reb and 3Ast. Alongside Towns 10Reb with O. Anunoby 11Pts. Toppled with J. Hart 13PTs, 11Reb, 2Ast and then. M. Bridges 14Pts for the Knicks was remarkable to see.
The Spurs on the other hand made monumental mistakes. Dominating with whip, at hand. Yet allowing the Knicks to cut, fade and dribble back into the game. Is one post-summer analysis SAN needs to explore, further. V. Wembanyama 19Pts, 14Reb, 2Ast with aid from the others: J. Champagnie 14Pts, D. Vassel 12Pts and contributing “Blue Print of Ron Harper” D. Harper 25Pts attempted to settle the score. D. Harper is the son of Bulls legend Ron Harper. Harper Jr. monumental performance should be looked at by scouts looking to build a championship roster, next season.
Back in New York, following news of NYK winning the title. The following barbershop (X) group was created by legend Walt Frazier
How’d Knicks won their 1st Title since1973?
Brunson: “We played like we wanted to go home champions” “Big Body” aligned his 45Pts performance with NBA finals legends of basket, balls past.
MJ (45Pts) from 1998 at Utah. 1980’s Magic(42Pts) vs PHI. The Haws 1958 Petti (50Pts) against Boston. Not to mention 2021 Giannis (50Pts) vs Phi. What happened to Wemby Spurs? After the game, the alien from Texas was quoted, anointed and heard at the Alamo:
“We dominated most of the series but our errors are punished so hard”-VW
The series saw differential score margins beyond the ropes. 1st quarter, the Spurs by 57Pts. 2nd quarters Knicks by 29Pts. Followed by 3rd quarters saw the Knicks trailing by 14Pts. Onto final Q4, as seen during game 4, NYK came, back from behind a 29Pt deficit. Doogie, biscuits with French Baguette for that A#s. For real!
SAN lead the contest in minutes ahead. 173:36 at 72.3% to that of 56:34min 23.6% for the Knicks. In game five. Bust, rust and allowing J. Brunson to rope-a-dope leads thought. Were among critical errors SAN needs to explore during the postseason. Wemby in game 5 scored 9Pts in 1st 16min. Followed by 10pts overall. 3-7 FG during 1st 15min to 4-12 there after. Grabbing 8Reb with under 16min in Q1 to that of 16Reb for Q2, 3 & 4.
On the contrary, J. Brunson is now the best player in the world. Winning his first NBA title along with finals MVP.
Third, moment is future tense and all things uncertain. As the future should be. About making choices. Satire is meant to invoke conversational tongue and cheek. Rather than to infer prejudice or name calling.
The series is an attempt to pin down cultural differences amongst our species as means to bring us together. For real!
AKA: Pussy Galore, oh behave Austin.
Final Thoughts: The Roast Special. From Cheap Blow, Outs. Between Alamo Cut & Fades. Including a Dome full on Nuns. The Garden When Nuts! for Kings from “New” York. For Real!
The New York Knicks are NBA Champions. Defeating the San Antonio Spurs 4-1. Emancipating the phrase heard all over NYC: “Knicks in 5”
First, the New York Knicks are NBA champions. Not since 1973 have I witness monumental celebrations. On the one hand, celebrating new kings. Raising expectations, haters and believers. Correspondingly discussing 1994 towards 2026. While erecting clashes between sports and politics.
Second, I explore NBA final backstories. With fiction in mind. Developing gonzo basketball satirical stories. Sidelining character transformations from gameplay dynamics. Allowing punditry “Teli” analysis to shape these mental sources. Arriving at dialoging plot setting location. Where? here, there and only in New York. In a world where sex worker prostitution is legalized. Together with federal Cannabis decriminalization, hey man! Several food service massage parlors have risen into existence. In contrast with street meat trucking eatery. Former and current NBA stars battle for guest relation supremacy. East of China Town, nails and lube are competing to score.
Third, a word about free agency Summer madness. Is beginning to unravel across the association. Let’s play to grab all the basket, balls.
First Person Narrator. Back in 1973: When the Knicks won their second title. Nineteen seventy three was popping with disco waltz’s. Along with economic stagnation, graffiti art galleries on Subway maps. Began to adorned New York. With urine infested streets. While the booming 80s saw rising NBA legends. Magic, Bird, MJ, Thomas and Dr. Jay. New York reconstruction periods between 1994 towards 2026. Slowly began to galvanized into coalescing experiences. Corporeal heavenly politics began to blur economic planning with safety first.
First, in 1994. Loosing in seven games to champions from Houston. The Rockets simply had more heart to give. Then, in 1999. Twin towers David Robinson and Tim Duncan eliminated the Knicks in five games. During these years, the City that never sleeps. Woke up with an array of political realities. Vis-à-vis police brutalities, economic development, sensational lewd art. Including replacing 42nd nudity with tourism theatrical mateine.
A year before 2000. Words of fear around all boroughs included: Y2K, crack, New Jack City, Sperminator, the twin towers and Sensation for Shit’s sake.
Today, we celebrate the New York Knicks first 21st Century championship. Alongside with honoring the best team in town. Jaylen Brunson rope-a-dope heroics. K. Towns defensive play. O. Anunoby tip, fade and boxing out Wemby. With contributing plays from J. Hart, has plenty of heart. J. Alvarado, M. Robinson formed a perfect union. Received the key to the City during Mamdani democratic socialism agenda. What’s good for New York reflects greatly for all and then some.
Second Person Narration. According to Mental Sources: Backstories in Mind.
KAT’s Deli is a chain of massage envy inspired parlors. located in the South Bronx. With additional venues in Washington Heights. Managed by no other than “Sir” K. A. Towns. Offers VIP services with traditional Chimi Churri sandwiches. On the menu at KAT’s Deli: The ultimate ChimiLube deluxe combo comprises. Between Vagina In Player accommodations with all you can eat Chimi.
Comprises around all you can eat while enticing your heavenly body. With accompanying club “Pingis” night life. Experiences, eatery and plenty of it. For real, player!
West and away from Towns City. Resides “OG1 Wakanda Anunoby” street meat joint. Partnering with African American Spike Lee. African star light player O. Anunoby food truck concept. Combines halal chicken, lamb, African yellow rice, shredded lettuce. Over BBQ white sauce or as the locals call it: “Street Puttie Tang” sauce. Each food truck comes, equipped with a porta-potty privacy chamber. Services include portable toilet, in case Malika Andrews may need Pepto-Bismol. Topple with the trucks special. Foot Jobs for free.
When you order “The Charles Special” According to sources close to the meat. ESPN Charles Barkley was seen food tasting outside the Garden, prior to games three and four. Charles, has publicly endorsed his tremendous dislike for Angolan ballers. However, does enjoy African Halal related eatery with extra lewd services. Specially the OG1 trucking cart.
Sir Charles Vs Angola. When African Americans meet Africans. There can only be one HighLander. The Charles special comprises between a Chicken or Lamb Gyro plate. With your choice between foot servicing “John” or your very onw DVD copy of Coming to America, by Eddy Murphy.
Apparently, Angola fans were seen yelling towards Chuck, saying: “You’re not a real African” “Go home, African American” After four quarters, Charles had enough. He then proceeded to strike the Angola player in the chest. In what appeared to be frustration mixed in with African American pride.
Enjoy street meat foot servicing over ChimiLube. Forget about it! What you’ve head about “Meatball” parmesan teaming up with Lin “sanity” dumpling Lin. Chuck finally got his street meat delivered. Alongside, foot jobs galore with extra BBQ sauce.
On the side. The way Charles & Shaq takes the basket, ball.
For Real, player. Charles was seen running for the bathroom, Pepto-Bismol at hand. Depending on Depend diapers to hold it in. Chuck hotel bill was over budget due to extra toilet paper delivery. Compliments of OG1 street meat special sauce.
However, OG1 came to America to play ball. Enrolling at BMCC prior to joining the NBA. He majored in several business courses. Including culinary food trucking, massage therapy and Halal spices. To the delight of Chuck’s mouth and anus. Angola finally strike back at the African American empire.
For Real!
Third Person Free Agency Narration: Next Steps Across the Association.
Free agency chatter is a buzz across the association. Giannis should go to the Thunder for Chet Holgrem. OCK 1st to 2nd round picks can also be included. The Bucks rebuilding strategy without Giannis is now underway. Although this may be true, Colin indicates Boston will get “The Greek Freak”. Lebron could land in San Antonio. The Spurs need season experience during the postseason. While Lebron tries to catch MJ and Kobe. Cementing his goat of all time narrative. Wemby and LBJ playing together would be amazing to see. Jaylen Brown may arrive in LA to aid Luka’s backcourt. Can the Lakers win championships with their star franchise player? Is yet to be determine. Luka is privately asking for shooters’ while LA wonders how to compete with OCK. The Lakers have been swept twice in the playoffs by the Thunder. Yikes, Rob! While Jaylen Brunson and Karl Anthony Towns work out a 100$M agreement to be the face of Nike. The Knicks need to figure out how to bring all players back, next year.
Next, he explains why Jalen Brunson and Sam Darnold are the perfect sports redemption stories. Colin then reacts to Luka Doncic’s comments about the Los Angeles Lakers’ needs this offseason. Finally, Colin is joined by Ethan Strauss to discuss the latest in the NBA and WNBA”
The Roast of San Antonio Spurs.
Hosted by ChimiLube, OG1 Street Meet & Hashtag Halleluiah. Nuts, Bust and Nuns.
With Special Appearances From Charles “Take your Depend diapers” Just in Case Your Ass Depends on It.
Act One
Phrases with corny jokes to put between Victor___
& Wembanyama
- Victor “Escalator to heaven” Wembanyama.
- Victor “French legs baguette” Wembamyama.
- Victor “Got away with several flagrant fouls” Wembamyama.
- Victor “Got schooled by big body like a little female dog” Wembamyama. Oh, is he Brunson little, Bi$c%. For Real!
- Victor “I want to win so bad is like my life Depend on it. Oh Shit” Wembanyama.
Act Three
The Alamo Dome Theater. Film screening series: Debbie Does Dallas, Private Teacher & Nina Hartley Hashtag Halleluiah.
Coach Mitch Johnson side hustle business includes several adult theaters. In, around and all up in that. Wonderful San Antonio BBQ Texas. During the NBA finals, the theater screened Nina Harley “Hashtag Halleluiah” ejaculations. A series of sex education movies expressing sexual freedom. Spanking, BDSM, how to properly give hand jobs. While shaving men’s balls. Later placing all that residue pubic hair inside a basket. Creating J. Champagnie hair style, entitled: “Chia Pubic Afro Lust” for men who play ball.
For Real Player!
Contrary to popular belief. Champaign visit to the Garden was meet with yet another confusion. He was mistaken for one of Rikers Island most notorious gangs. Bang.
The infamous “Jurley Curls” was a 90’s street gang. Infamous for adorning afro styled curls. Including pouring Champaign over their opponents turfed. Battling to win neighborhood approval with their signature flamboyant styles.
One teenage men over 18 at a time. Thanks to Tracy Lords (US18 Bill). Including taboo adult sexual experiences. Nina’s Hashtag Halleluiah follows a series of sexually deprived ladies of the lord. Battling lustful ways and means during a Summer filled with young men visiting the convent.
The film depicts scenes of men’s getting their pubic areas shaved. Washed, caress and trimmed. Providing the ultimate cut and fade barbershop hair style. To private parts otherwise neglected. Follow the adult film series climax on X “Hashtag Halleluiah” for adults over 18. These Nuns, are nuts for lust.
Act Two
Bunson vs Wemby during final two minutes in the NBA finals. Speaks volumes to how “big body” Brunson dominated the Alamo, Alien.
During the final two minutes in every game. Brunson scored 17Pts to that of Wemby 4Pts. Furthermore, Brunson average 7-13 FG-FGA. In contrast to Victor “Hastag Halleluiah. He came all over that” Wembamyama. 1-7 FG-FGA. On the other hand, Brunson was 2-3 from 3-PT-3PA. In contrast, Wemby was 0-4 from behind the 3Pt line. While Brunson had 0 turnovers. Wemby had 2 during critical moments. To summarize, Wemby got shaved. Hard, erecting monumental Afro Chia hair styles. San placed all its pubic hairs. Inside coach Mitch “Nun” Johnson. Johnson got a brand new cut and fade.
Act Four
Between Two Ferns: Confusion and (X) Prayer Groups.
The Alamo Dome Theater. Post film critique gallery. Encompasses Nina Hartley adult for sex education talks. Different from the opposition. Coach Johnson invited NYK J. Brunson, Towns and OG Anunoby to participate. During games one, two and five at San Antonio. Participating as Jaylen “Big Body” Brunson. KAT’s “ChimiLube” deli. With special appearances from OG1 “Wakanda Street Meat” Anunoby. These characters delighted theater goers, while engulfing anger from religious organizations on X. According to Pastor “When the Hell is Jesus coming, back” Woodie Nutts: “Our religious norms are being threaten by progressive extremism wanting to legalize all prostitution actives, across the association“. On the one hand, The Alamo Dome Theater posted several hashtags. Depicting the film title: Hashtag Halleluiah. Developing conflicts with confusion for other religious folks. Desperately seeking prayer faith groups. Instead of sexual education feminism of spirit. According to Ms. Hartley Wiki: “Las Vegas Weekly has described Hartley as an “outspoken feminist, sex educator and advocate for sexual freedom” and “a guiding force for a generation of feminist porn stars”.[4] She has described herself both as a “classical liberal feminist”[38][39] and a democratic socialist.[32] Hartley began engaging in feminist activism in the 1980s.[40] She has said:
Based on my experience as a woman and a sexual being, and my understanding that I had the right to decide for myself what to do with my life – that’s what I understood to be feminist, to give everybody choices “.[41]
The Theater offers room accommodation options. Those seeking to learn about feminist sexual liberation are encourage to visit Dome 69. Conversely, Pastor Nutts is encourage when visiting to attend Dome 33. All about the second coming, without lube, pubes or feminism of spirit.
The NBA Season is Over: The Knicks are NBA Champions. Naming Basketball References.
“Witness the defining five-game clash between the New York Knicks and San Antonio Spurs in the NBA Finals—a battle that ended with the Knicks seizing glory and etching their name in history as champions.”
Are you a New, Yorker? or have you been to that old York part of Town. Where does your Willie reside? Suck it, Church of England.
“Watch the best moments from Inside the NBA of Shaquille O’Neal, Charles Barkley, Kenny “The Jet” Smith, Ernie Johnson and their guests during the 2026 NBA Finals series between the New York Knicks and San Antonio Spurs.”
Charles, Kenny, the others: Shaq and Ernie. With stats provided by “Sir” Under Dog. Aided this writer to blurred reality stats with alluring fictional tales.
Blending headlines ripped from sports media analysis with punditry of spirit. Thank you for another Emmy award winning show.
In my humble opinion Colin. Small guards can dominate when teamed up with big’s to assist. Jaylen has Towns & Robinson to space the floor. Contrary to AI during the finals with LA. Iverson had to contest with Kobe and Shaq.
“Colin Cowherd says Jalen Brunson’s Finals MVP proves small guards can DOMINATE the NBA“
“On First Take, Chris “Mad Dog” Russo, Stephen A. Smith, Markieff Morris and Marcus Morris Sr. join Shae Cornette to discuss the greatest New York City athletes of all time.” I underestimated the New York Knicks ascendancy to have their way at Burger King.
I picked the Cavs to get out of the East. While choosing San Antonio along with the herd. The Knicks have made be believe that small guards can win. Brunson dominated Wemby for supremacy. Jaylen Brunson ranks amongst my Mount Rushmore for NY athletes, all time. We love you: Jeter, Patrick, Messier & “Big Body” Brunson.
“The New York Knicks beat the San Antonio Spurs 4-1 to win their first NBA Title since 1973. Nick Wright, Chris Broussard, and Kevin Wildes discuss how the Knicks pulled off their miraculous playoff run, and they ask what went wrong for Victor Wembanyama and the Spurs.
Plus, they discuss USMNT beating Paraguay 4-1 and what it means for their FIFA World Cup chances.”
Last word. Winning a back-to-back title is one of the most difficult task to accomplish in pro sports. Should the NBA 2026-27 season see another run for NYK. Brother Dolan needs to rolled out his “Blue Apron” check book. I want to thank these Podcast series for providing valuable insight, stats and insightful commentary. Fueling this writer mind with wit, Gonzo and psychic automatism. For real, player. This series picks up again during pre-season Fall Basketball. I will see you at the 80th park, in the meantime. Learn to put the ball, in that glorious hole.
Arts Journal Zine 
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